What Makes Us Different

I love when the El Douchebag, the President, does the whole "us versus them..." thing like he did during his Deer-in-Headlights speech the other not...

"Hello America. I'm a huge douche bag. That's right. I was wrong. I take full responsiblity. Earlier in my Presidency, I wasn't quite aware of the level of douchebaggery I had achieved. But now I see it, and it's not enough. I want to take my douchebaggery to a whole 'nother level. I'm asking over 20,000 men and women to see if they can get themselves killed this go round, again, another time, in Iraq. I know this won't change the war at all, but I'm a douchebag. Isn't that reason enuogh? This action shall make even more Americans see me as the douchebag I really am. Even those whose votes I bought with tax cuts in previous elections. You too shall see it. What was once just a few people calling me a douchebag behind my back, while wearing a bomber jacket in the back of the class at Harvard Business School, has turned into millions of people seeing me for what I am. A D-Bag. What was once just those select few seeing me chew tobacca and spitting it in a cup, is a nation, wiping the spit off their faces..."

So today I was wondering to myself, again, about the stupidity of so many Americans. As I rode the PATH train through the pit at Ground Zero, every day I cannot help but think of the amount of people who have stepped up their douchebaggery to follow the lead of the biggest douchebag of a generation.

I started to ask myself, "Are people really going to change?" Then my mind wondered off and started thinking of the whole Swift Boat campaign...for TRUTH, of course. It's amazing how many will lie to dissuade Americans looking for the real truth. But I expect nothing less from these selfish scumbags. In fact, they're worse than Bush in so many ways.

I started thinking about the fact that the Swift Boat Vets WROTE A BOOK. They got together, with not one iota of truth, and wrote a book smearing a man who served this country in Vietnam. A BOOK!

Then I started thinking about liberals and Democrats, and whether they'd write a book. Well, of course they would. But that book would be totally different. It'd be a math book, or physics book, or an unreadable 1500 page book about growing up in Arkansas, catching some wind down below, etc. But it wouldn't be a book of lies. This led me to Rudy Guiliani, who may have been the reason I started thinking about this in the first place, being at Ground Zero, and all. You remember Rudy, the man who held up the beams of the falling towers so a few more babies could crawl out, right? Yeah, that dick.

Now Rudy Guiliani has cheated on his wives, had his girlfriend living in the Mayor's mansion while married, and attending World Series Games with his son and the woman. He has a dishonest confidant and cop working for him, and later for his private firm Giulini partners. He was unconcerned with the way minorities were treated by the police, and let them know it. He was the lucky overseer of a city going through a strong economy, more so from a national level, which enabled him to look good. He was all of this, and so much more.

If Democrats and liberals were as lame, manipulative, and dishonest as so many conservatives do you know what they'd do? That's right. THEY'D WRITE A BOOK! They'd smear this guy non-stop. They'd be on every show before the election talking about Rudy and his dishonest buddy Ralph Reed. This is what they'd do. They'd talk about a man who would do, or say anything for positive press, and they'd quash it all. But they won't. There'll be no book. Why? Why no book? Because as dumb and naive as Democrats and liberals can be, unlike conservatives, they're not inherently dishonest. They don't lie, cheat, and steal, head to church, pray for forgiveness, and think it's all good. Sure, they have their morons, all big groups do. But at the end of the day they have a certain naivete. A certain belief that people will see through the lies, and make the right choice. They'll get past the FOX News and the BOOKS. I'm sure the Hillary book is being printed now.

Unfortunately, these books and voices and shows carry a lot of weight. Americans are succeptible to the swaying. Democrats have too much class to lie, even though a Rudy book would be all truths. Somehow Republicans, in their lying, would make the Rudy truths lies. That's their thing: lying.

So if you believe good will win out, you keep relying on most liberals to do the right thing, and not play these games. Liberals don't care about the bullshit minutia conservatives spin. Too bad so many do. Liberals care about truly fixing problems; conservatives care about avoiding dealing with, and profiting one way, or another. Whatever happens, I'm not sure, but I know I'll never be the guy not saying something about it.

(Too late to edit)

Oh, It's So Fun...

So I was just told that quite a few Air America "talents", and I use that word VERY LOOSELY, have been knocking on the doors of Sirius. No surprise there at all. Sirius supposedly not that interested, and honestly, why would they be?!?!? Unlike those who launched AAR, who overpaid non-radio talent, minus Randi and Ed Schultz, the people at Sirius actually have radio backgrounds, and can see AAR for what it is. Regardless of Sirius' success or failues, these are radio people.

Those who launched AAR were thinking short term: GET RID OF BUSH!!! CREATE OUR OWN MOVEMENT!!! Problem is, these people wanted to create it in a day, the type of thing conservatives were building for years. They didn't develop talent; they took actors, and writers, and comics, and others, and said, "This is easy...you do it!" They took the despised and labeled "Liberal Elite" and gave them radio shows! Not the best call.

Movements take time, and radio is local first, something AAR has never understood. You know those bumper stickers Libs made: Think Globally, Act Locally? Lost on AAR. It's called irony.

So now those folks are looking for the same gigs I am. We'll see what happens. I know on bad days I'm better than most of them, but I never wrote for SNL, and acted on a TV show, or movie...so I must not be as good on the radio! Riiight. I'd outwork them, and outperform them because it's my life. These people, this was not their lives before they started, but now they got a taste, and they want to stay on. Help us, Sirius, help us!

I'm not sure if my desire to get back on the air will be fulfilled. Heck knows everyone who heard me in Jersey wishes I was. The station I left is back where they started before I got there, and that's off the first page of ratings. Apparently, beating Imus in the Morning wasn't their thing. Hopefully I'll make it happen for me, but more importantly, for everyone else. That's why I do it: for the listeners. Radio has become so painfully bad these days, so typical, so repetitive, so boring, it pains me to be on the sideline.

Here's to hope. Just hired by AOL/Time Warner to do some work for their new plans, and maybe that'll be the place I make it happen. I'll keep y'all posted.

One More Thing...

Just remember, this President and the Conservatives, they don't want to "spend your money." All they want to do is send your kids off to war to die...and spend your money to fight the war...

He Keeps Pulling Me Back...

I want to stop commenting, I do, but he's just such a lying piece of shit I can't not comment.
Now when I say "lie" do I mean that he actually told a lie in the truest sense of the word? No, I don't think he does that. But by being such a misleading douche he is essentially lying. Parents hold their children to a higher level of honesty. When a child misleads a parent they've essentially lied, or been dishonest. Then again, he has the mind of a child, so I guess it's the same thing.

ANYWAY...

Here are the things that bother me most, which are the disigenuous parts that really bother me.

First, he references the Iraq Study Group twice, the second time he claims that we are "keeping with" them, as if he was ever following their lead in the first place. His point was that we'll imbed US Troops into Iraqi forces, as recommended. Now I read the ISG Report and it was really really pointless. It was some common sense stuff, bunched together, that really means nothing. But to Bush's point in sticking with them, the only reason he referenced them at all was to pretend he's taking their advice, or as if he's working on their recommendations. This is not the case.

The Iraq Study Group, for the most part, recommends pulling out/redeployment, and constant diplomacy with surrounding countries like Syria and Iran. Do you hear the President discussing this? Of course not.

He may take one, or two things the ISG said to heart, but basically, his plan will have little to do with their plan. And their plan, while obviously they didn't expect to accept it as a whole, was to be accepted as a whole to have success. So the only reason he even references the plan in the first place is to act as if he's actually listening to others. Mr. Lets-Be-BiPartisan-But-Never-Has-Been-Fucking-Douche-Bag-Guy.

The second great reference of this glorious speech was his mentioning of our "intelligence sharing" and "Patriot air defense system." Just ftr, are you aware of the number of Scud missiles the Patriot air defense system took out in the first Gulf War? If you said any number other than ZERO you'd be wrong. ZERO. But it looked. Of course Mr. Father-of-the-Lets-Be-BiPartisan-But-Never-Has-Been-Fucking-Douche-Bag-Guy touted it during and after the war. Apples and trees.

I'm sure the Patriot air defense system will have as much impact on the outcome of this war as I will, as well as the supposed intelligence sharing. Think about that oxymoron: President Bush shares intelligence...

And finally, once again, you're either with us, or against it. Bush shared this nugget with the nation:

On one side are those who believe in freedom and moderation. On the other side are extremists who kill the innocent, and have declared their intention to destroy our way of life.

This made me scratch my head since I'm well aware that we've killed THOUSANDS of innocents during this conflict.

Of course, I know which side he believes he is on, and of course, clearly the psychos in Iraq would kill me in a second, but in truth, this whole comment makes no sense! Mr. Lets-Be-BiPartisan-But-Never-Has-Been-Fucking-Douche-Bag-Guy doesn't believe in moderation. Mr. Lets-Be-BiPartisan-But-Never-Has-Been-Fucking-Douche-Bag-Guy doesn't believe in "freedom." Mr. Lets-Be-BiPartisan-But-Never-Has-Been-Fucking-Douche-Bag-Guy has been quite responsible for killing many innocent people because of this bullshit war. But I'm sure the Moronic Minions, who actually think that when this guy speaks they're hearing something noteworthy, will follow every word and nod their goose-stepper heads.

That's all...

But wait, wait, one more thing about the speech...

If we have taken away Al-Qaeda's safe haven in Afghanistan, as Bush said, where are they now? Besides the obvious...Afghanistan and Iraq.

So What Gives?

Every day I want to post something about the absurdity and stupidity of our President, but frankly, what's even the point?

Tonight the moron will tell the country that we need more troops in Iraq, and he will even take some responsibility by admitting that he did not have enough troops in Iraq since the beginning. How BOLD of him, post-election, to say such things. Bold. Remember when everything he did was BOLD? Now all those things look just plain old fucking dumb...like himself.

Remember No Child Left Behind? Umm, guess what. Children are behind. Nothing has changed. The big label and the small budget, well, that's putting the squeeze on districts as they'll have to forfeit dollars. Of course, more will fail because of it, and their drive towards privatization will continue.

When they first concocted this cockamamie bullshit idea it probably sounded so sweet off Grover Norquist and Karl Roves' lips. About how once they failed they could privatize, fork money over to religious schools, and create choice. All we're really going to get is more uneducated kids.

So that's one thing they failed about.

Then of course is the war. Massive failure on ever front. But more than just failure. It is a complete clusterfuck that will have ramifications for decades.

Then there's the energy companies getting away with billions of dollars in uncollected taxes (yeah, yeah, it was Clinton's Presidency that enacted the law). Okay, but the law was intended to do something it didn't. If Clinton was President now he'd CHANGE THE LAW. These guys just smile, acting as if someone else runs the country.

Of course, there's the environment. Avoiding Global Warming issues since the day they took office. Renegging on a promise to offer their own plans.

So tell me, Conservative Guy, WHAT HAVE THEY ACCOMPLISHED THAT'S ACTUALLY GOOD?

Yes, yes, they cut taxes, which of course gets us to the crux. They have no real ideas except to appeal to the base beliefs of people: the self (through money and vote buying) and religion.

What have they done that's good?

What Do You Want to Know?

So Florida beat up Ohio State tonight, and everyone will see it how they want to see it. But I'm here to tell it like it is.

First off, I'm not truly upset for myself. It's only football. And to paraphrase Troy Smith, "If this is as bad as it gets...I'll take it..."

Second, the game.

Florida came out like underdogs, and played hard. Meyer outcoached Tressel. But Meyer didn't lose his best weapon. Commentators can say whatever they want, but Ted Ginn being out was an enormous issue for the Buckeyes.

When you are missing the most dangerous player on the field it gives the defense a huge leg up, and offense a major handicap. After Florida tied the game the Buckeyes were playing on one leg, from both a player's position, and a coordinators. A defense doesn't have to worry at all about the one guy who changes everything, and ears get pinned back. The #1 corner now works the #2 WR, and the Safety is now free to roam, or blitz. Now the QB has to disregard his first read, a man now getting press coverage, as opposed to a 5 yard cushion, which makes second down 2nd and 5, as oppopsed to 2 and 10. Losing Ginn meant so much. 3 and out meant a defense had to be on the field double time.

Take Jerry Rice off the 49ers, and tell me they win the Superbowl. Take Dwayne Jarrett off of USC. Think Michigan gets crushed? Please.

Then there's the 50 days. I didn't know if it would matter, but it may have mattered. This gets me to the BCS itself, pushing the game off almost 2 months, and FOX, making sure you missed at least one play because of commercial break, and overpaying for the BCS, which leads to even more breaks. More breaks equals more rest.

The SEC does well in bowl games against Ohio State because OSU usually has to play really good SEC teams, like Peyton Manning's Tennessee team. If Ohio State played Florida two weeks, or even a month after the regular season, different ball game. Give a team that relies on speed almost two months to prepare and rest, and take a team that's used to grinding and battling for 12 weeks, it's a different type of advantage. I've always felt that Florida teams, and "fast" teams in general had an advantage over grinding Big 10 teams in bowl games for that reason. One team gets to play their game with a bit of an edge.

Nevertheless, the Buckeyes needed to blitz Leak, and they didn't. They needed to run the ball in the first half, and they didn't. Tressel was rattled by being down, and a lack of Ginn. Florida won convincingly, and everything went their way (including the first drive with the good spot, and the second TD when they guy didn't get in). It happens. But everything went their way for whatever reason.

You live to fight another day.

But again, if this is as bad as it gets, so be it. It is what it is, it happened, and on another day it would have been a different ball game.

Cheers.

Ooooooh That Smell!

I can hear it now, "The tearrists are trying to use up all of our natural gas...this is why we must drill in the Arctic Wildlife Refuge region area place..."

I'm so confident in the city/local governments for spreading the word that "Yes, we know it's not dangerous" and "No, we have no idea what it is." If that doesn't reassure you, what will?

"Yes, we know Saddam had weapons of Mass Destruction..."

"No, we have no idea if he still does...but it will all work out fine..."

That's the type of confidence we're working with here.

How is it possible that there's a gas leak emanating from somewhere in New York/Jersey and there's no sensor capable of picking it up? HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE? I'm confident this thing is no big deal, but it's pretty absurd that we cannot discern where this is coming from 6 hours after hearing about it.